Paul wrote that love does not envy or boast. Yet these two practices are woven into modern life to such a degree that many cannot see any other option. Shawna Boren unpacks how envy and boasting undermine the practice of love and then shows us a better way, a way out and into agape love.
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Love Does Not Envy or Boast
• Shawna Boren
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In this sermon, Shawna Boren brings looks at Paul’s claim that love does not envy or boast. First, let’s look at envy. This word implies competition and rivalry that occurs when we want something that another has. It is rooted in the practice of comparison. In his book, The Most Excellent Way to Lead, Perry Noble writes, “The Comparison Trap can cause us to be so obsessed with others that we try to imitate what they’re doing instead of initiating what we’re supposed to be doing.” Comparison is such a pervasive practice in our modern-day experience that we don’t even realize we’re doing it. Our society is in a constant state of assessing our social standing or ranking.
Comparing ourselves to others actually makes no logical sense. We all have different fingerprints, and thus we are all unique. How can we compare one of a kind with another one of a kind. Using other peoples’ experiences, accomplishments and gifting to measure our own is futile. Paul wrote in Galatians 6:4, “Each person should test their own work and be happy with doing a good job and not compare themselves with others.”
Like crabs in a bucket that pull down those who are climbing out, envy will cause us to pull down anyone who flourishes. Instead, we are called to celebrate others, to be a blessing to them, and build them up. We can do this because there is plenty of room for us all. We do not need to try to be like others because God made each one of us as we are, and the Spirit best moves through us in the way that God made us.
Now let’s turn to boasting. This word literally means “to behave as a braggart” or to “be a windbag.” It is the practice of calling attention to oneself, which keeps us from lifting up others. Again, this is a pervasive pattern of this world. Studies show that when we talk about ourselves, we get a “pleasure hit” in the brain, like a dopamine surge. We do this because we want to promote ourselves, because we feel like we are not getting the attention we desire and thus we feel small.
But being a braggart does not align with our calling to live in love. Instead, we are to do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit (Philippians 2:3-4). As Fred Rogers said, “As human beings, our job in life is to help people realize how rare and valuable each one of us really is, that each of us has something that no one else has … something inside that is unique to all time. It’s our job to encourage each other to discover that uniqueness and to provide ways of developing its expression.”
We are not to be conformed to the patterns of this world, but to be transformed by the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2). To the extent that we are allowing envy and/or boasting to permeate our hearts, we are being conformed to the patterns of this world. To renew our minds, we must ask ourselves two questions. First, we must ask: “What is the lie that I am believing?” This we must let go. Then we ask, “What is the truth that God wants me to hold to instead?” This truth we take in. As Dan Kent says, “You can be who God wants you to be without making yourself too big or too small.” We can trust God and God’s love that he will provide. He will take care of us. And he will lead us into spaces of flourishing, even in the midst of the storm that surrounds us.
Hide Extended SummaryTopics: Gratitude, Love, Relationships
Sermon Series: Wholehearted, Love Does
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The MuseCast: January 13
Focus Scripture:
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1 Corinthians 13:4
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
2 thoughts on “Love Does Not Envy or Boast”
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Can we have a transcript of Greg’s pre-sermon from January 11th please. It was right on the money!
Hi Will, thanks for the suggestion! I’ve added a transcript file of Greg’s pre-sermon message to the list of resources linked above.
–Sarah from the Communications Team